International Horcrux Skype Adventures

Matt and Steve dial themselves ACROSS THE GLOBE to collect the precious mind-fluids of Log and Gavin. Will they restore peace to the land before the horcrux shards fall into evil hands?

Script

• JINGLE •
"Come with me, and we'll be, in a world of Regular Fa-heatures!"
STEVE
Hello, and welcome to episode ninety-four of Regular Features.
MATT
Of Regular Features, the podcast that's just me and Steve.
STEVE
Yes, because the four members of the Regular Features team have been scattered to the winds…
MATT
Mmmm.
STEVE
…to all four corners of the planet.
MATT
And it's up to you, the chosen one…
STEVE
…to retrieve… What, is it like, a horcrux?
MATT
All four of pieces, yeah, and then…
STEVE
I haven't watched Harry Potter. Is it, like, a horcrux?
MATT
Yes, it's basically like a horcrux.
STEVE
Like Captain Planet's rings.
MATT
Mother-fucking horcrux.
STEVE
The four corners of the planet are: 1) Matt's bedroom.
MATT
Yeah.
STEVE
2) Matt's bedroom again.
MATT
Yeah.
STEVE
3) Nottingham, where Log is. 4) Los Angeles, California, where Gav Murphy has had himself.
MATT
So, I'd recommend, like, doing all the quests in Matt's bedroom first, because you can get a lot of them done, or you can just save it until last because you know it won't take long.
STEVE
Yeah, unless you want to do a big loop then you do one in Matt's bedroom,…
MATT
Mmmm.
STEVE
…go to L.A., then do Nottingham, then come back and finish in Matt's bedroom.
MATT
Doesn't seem optimal frankly. But anyway, as part of this, let's kick it off with my feature. My feature this week is "Let's use Skype to call Gav…"
STEVE
That's good.
MATT
…"and Log, but Gav first".
STEVE
Right, Gav, come in Gav.
GAV
Hello!
MATT
Hello!
STEVE
Hello! That's Gav Murphy!
MATT
It's Gavin…. Internet's Gav Murphy! You're live from Los Angeles!
LOG
TODO
CLOSING CREDITS ROLL